Every Sperm Is Sacred Lyrics

     Dad: There are Jews in the world, there are Buddhists.
	There are Hindus and Mormons and then,
	There are those that follow Mohammud, BUT
	I've never been one of them.

	I'm a Roman Catholic,
	And have been since before I was born,
	And the one thing they say about Catholics
	Is they'll take you as soon as you're warm.

	You don't have to be a six footer,
	You don't have to have a great brain,
	You don't have to have any clothes on,
	You're a Catholic the moment Dad came.

	Because...

	Every sperm is sacred,
	Every sperm is great,
	If a sperm is wasted,
	God gets quite irate.
          
Children: Every sperm is sacred,
	Every sperm is great,
	If a sperm is wasted,
	God gets quite irate.
          
   Child: Let the heathen spill theirs
	On the dusty ground,	
	God shall make them pay for
	Each sperm that can't be found.

Children: Every sperm is wanted,
	Every sperm is good,
	Every sperm is needed,
	In your neighborhood.
          
     Mum: Hindu, Taoist, Mormon,
	Spill theirs just anywhere,
	But God loves those who treat their
	Semen with more care.

     Men: Every sperm is sacred,
	Every sperm is great,
   Women:	If a sperm is wasted,
Children:	God gets quite irate.
          
  Priest: Every sperm is wanted,
Br. & Gr:	Every sperm is good,
 Nannies:	Every sperm is needed,
Cardinal:	In your neighborhood.
     
Children: Every sperm is useful,
	Every sperm is fine,
 Funeral:	God needs everybody's,
Mourner1:	Mine!
Mourner2:	And mine!
  Corpse:	And mine!     

     Nun: Let the Pagan spill theirs,
	O'er mountain, hill, and plain,
 Statues: God shall strike them down for
	Each sperm that's spilt in vain.

Everyone: Every sperm is wanted,
	Every sperm is good,
	Every sperm is needed,
	In your neighborhood.

	Every sperm is sacred,
	Every sperm is great,
	If a sperm is wasted,
	God gets quite irate.